My 5-year-old daughter loves to play games. And by play I mean win. And by win I mean beat the pants off other kids and do a butt-shaking, arm-waving, head-tossing, happy dance after her victory.
Somehow her overzealous (yet in my opinion, age-appropriate) reaction to creaming the competition is my fault.
Blame the mommy for the child’s lack of humility and sportsmanship.
Whatever.
I agree her gloating is a bit excessive, and yes, I’ve addressed it on more than one occasion.
Still, the happy dance is riot.
My child is a work in progress and I’m learning on the job, so ease off the finger pointing.
And that goes double for the childhood development experts, who are taking aim at moms (once again) in a new report that basically says mothers are to blame if their children are poor sleepers.
Researchers concluded that if your baby has bad sleep habits it’s…oh yes it is… all together now… the MOTHER’S fault.
The study, which was published in the latest issue of Child Development, notes that if an expectant mom thinks babies who cry at night are suffering distress and need to be soothed and comforted, her baby is likely to have major sleep problems as an infant and into the preschool years.
Interestingly, the study fails to mention how a screaming tot affects the mother’s sleep patterns.
According to researchers, your child’s frequent night waking is your fault now, and was your fault way back when you were still pregnant. Heck, it was likely your fault even before the kid was conceived.
Basically, the study concludes that mothers, who allow their kids cry it out, and not get involved in midnight (and 2 a.m., 3:30 a.m., 5 a.m.) screamfests have babies who sleep better.
To test this theory researchers attached ankle monitors to dozens of babies and asked parents to keep sleep journals. According to the study, moms who went in and soothed their kids (via nursing, rocking, etc.) had children who woke more during the night. Conversely, the mothers, who let their children wail all night, had babies who woke up less.
According to my records, I was on Team Soothe. To me, my child’s cry meant distress. Subsequently, I fit into the self-aggrandizing weakling mommy camp.
I take full blame for the fact that my child didn’t really sleep through the night until she was two.
But, hey, three years later, she sleeps like a champ.
No, really, hold your applause.
Bottom line: I’m not a big blame-the-mommy fan. I think children are unique and react differently in different situations. As long as parents are doing the best they can in any given situation, then I say give them a break.
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