With so many marriages ending in divorce, it can leave you to wonder, “What makes a marriage work?” Now I am by no means an expert but I will very soon be celebrating 21 years of marriage, so hopefully I can provide at least some encouragement.
Let me start off by saying this. I will never tell someone, “I have been happily married for 20 years.” That would be a lie.
While there definitely has been more happiness than not, mixed in have been times where I wondered if we would make it. To pretend otherwise doesn’t really do any good.
I think that is where we start when determining what makes a marriage work. It isn’t always sunshine and roses. There are some seasons which are more difficult than others.
Having false expectations won’t make a marriage work. But knowing and expecting troubles to come will take the surprise out of it. Then you just need to figure out how to work through it.
That is another key to making a marriage work. You determine that no matter how challenging those difficult moments are, you will do everything in your power to see it through.
You may not like each other at times. You may question your decision to be married. But despite those thoughts and feelings, you press through.
Another way to make a marriage work is to give. While we might be more about getting, the fact remains that what you give into a marriage is what you will get back.
If you feed negativity, criticism and guilt into your marriage, what do you think you will receive in return? Sometimes it is a matter of taking a step back and looking at how we have been treating our spouse. Are we giving our love, time, encouragement and affection?
Finally, I think another key to making a marriage is work is to stop trying to fix your spouse. You can only change yourself. It is not your job to recreate the man or woman you married.
What tips do you have for making a marriage work?
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