I haven’t been blogging very much during the past 45 days. It isn’t because I haven’t wanted to write or don’t have a lot to write about. It isn’t because I’ve been enjoying the long summer days or a vacation in Hawaii. I haven’t been blogging much because I have been parenting a child who suffers from mental illness.
It really isn’t important how or why my child suffers from mental illness. I can make up a thousands reasons for her situation. It isn’t any easier because she is an Adopted child, because no matter how she became my daughter–she is my daughter, adoption doesn’t change anything. I am just a mother who loves a child that suffers from mental illness.
The exact diagnosis or details of her mental illness aren’t important. It could be any mental illness with any symptoms. The issues I face parenting an emotionally disturbed child can’t be measured and don’t really matter. What matters is that I am the mother of a mentally ill and emotionally disturbed child and love her just as much as any mother could possibly love her child.
I have not been writing because I have been looking for sanity in life. Thankfully, school has started and we are trying new and more medications. I am trying new therapy ideas and parenting methods. It takes a lot to first help my daughter and then find balance in our home. Some days the best I can do is not cry or have a complete breakdown. Other days there is a slight glimmer of hope. But, most days it is just plain exhausting and draining.
Writing just hasn’t been my first priority. As much as I enjoy blogging and need to have my own interest–parenting a child with mental illness is guaranteed to be a crazy life. Thankfully, I have flexibility and support. I have survived much worse then this crazy life! I know how to find my own sanity even under the worry and pain of witnessing my daughter cope and deal with her own problems.
Today is a new day and new chance for this mother to find peace and sanity. I have done this before and know what I need to do in order to find balance and time to do what I enjoy the most. In my next Blog in this series I will share the steps I am taking to find sanity while parenting a child with mental illness.
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