Part two continues.
(4) Frequency– punishment works best when it is infrequent, otherwise the child will become immune to its effects.
(5) Follow-through– if you issue a warning or threat you must always carry it out.
(6) Context– the atmosphere within the family is very important when administering punishment. Your relationship with your child is also important. If the atmosphere is hostile, the punishment will more than likely be taken differently from the way it was intended. The kids are also more likely to consider the punishment as meanness, rejection, etc., if their relationship with the punishing parent is cool or hostile.
When administering punishment what specific types should you use? One simple type is a reprimand. A reprimand is scolding. It is a way of letting your child know that you disapprove of a behavior.
Another common type of punishment is time-out. Time-out only works if you use it correctly. Here are some tips for time-out:
(1) You should select a place that is dull and non-stimulating.
(2) Keep all attention to a minimum, ignore all tantrums, crying and other protests.
(3) The amount of time spent in time-out should be short; generally one minute for every year of the child’s age (five minutes for a five-year-old).
(4) After the child comes from time-out, they must comply with any demands or requests that resulted in having to go to time-out in the first place.
(5) Tell the child that time-out begins only when the child is sitting quietly in the designated time-out place.
(6) Use praise and attention, rewards and privileges or reminder praise when your child behaves appropriately after serving their time.
And now the assignment for this week. This week practice using reprimands as a form of punishment for misbehavior and record which reprimands you used each day for which behaviors. Also, decide which behaviors you would like to lessen through the use of time-out. When these behaviors occur use time-out using the tips outlined above.
Next week: Removing Rewards and Privileges to Eliminate Serious Misbehaviors
See also:
8 Weeks to Well-behaved Child, Week 6, part one
8 Weeks to Well-behaved Child, Week 5
8 Weeks to Well-behaved Child, Week 4
8 Weeks To a Well Behaved Child: Week Three
8 Weeks To a Well Behaved Child: Week Two, Part Two
8 Weeks To a Well Behaved Child: Week Two
8 Weeks To a Well Behaved Child: Week One
8 Weeks To a Well Behaved Child