Well, the procedure was yesterday and today Tabby was free to come home. (She had to stay overnight at the vet’s so they could monitor her and administer pain medication if necessary.)
I was surprised when I opened her cat carrier and she popped right out. She seemed a little dazed, but more than happy to be home. I was happy to have her home too. I worried about her like crazy all day Monday. I know it’s a pretty standard procedure, but even those can run into snags from time to time. I was so relieved when Dr. Singleton called around two p.m. to let me know Tabby was in recovery and the operation had gone fine.
What I was not relieved to hear was that Tabby truly had been pregnant. The reason the vet couldn’t feel them is because they hadn’t calcified yet, which apparently means their little bones hadn’t formed. They were just little blobs that felt like fatty tissue.
If we’d done an x-ray, they would have appeared on there. Which left me wondering, “How many kittens had she been carrying?”
Six!
Gulp! What had I just done?
Dr. Singleton sensed my distress.
“It’s really for the better. It’s better for her. Saves her from the stress of pregnancy. And even though kittens are cute and you’d probably adopt them out okay, there’s no guarantee they’d go to good homes. Once they grow up, people tend to lose interest unfortunately.”
I know overpopulation is a huge problem. I’m aware of the sobering statistics for how many animals are euthanized each year because shelters can’t handle the volumes. I know it’s important to get pets spayed.
I know all of this, but still I felt awful. As I told my good friend Brenda, it’s like I saved one cat only to kill six more. And I couldn’t help but wonder: What if Tabby had wanted to be a mom? What if I took that away from her just because she couldn’t tell me not to?
It’s sort of silly, I know. But it’s how I felt. I’ve made amends with it and myself now (sort of). I think I’ll always feel a little twinge of guilt about it all though.
At least Tabby’s healthy. That’s what’s most important.