Have you ever been left at the altar? I haven’t. I can’t begin to imagine how that would feel to be standing at the altar, on what is supposed to be the best day of your life and either the bride doesn’t walk down the aisle (or worse flees ala The Runaway Bride) or as the bride waiting for the groom’s arrival and he never shows.
Romance Fails
Being left at the altar is not romantic, it’s a failure of romance. It’s a relationship flaw. There are numerous films (the aforementioned The Runaway Bride), television shows and novels that use abandonment at the altar as a storyline device or launching point. I won’t get into soap operas – soap weddings require a scorecard to keep track of much less how many brides have been abandoned, how many grooms have been abandoned and how many weddings have been interrupted at by rebels (Dynasty), by mob wars (General Hospital), by presumed dead spouses returning (all of them) and so many more that it just doesn’t bear repeating.
There is nothing romantic about being left at the altar. It’s a deeply painful and humiliating experience that can leave an individual emotionally and mentally scarred. It’s also a betrayal of all the potential vows that the couple intended to make. It can also make another relationship for either party very difficult.
After all, who wants to trust a bride or a groom who abandoned their first fiancé at the altar? What jilted bride or groom wants to put their trust or faith in another person? I’ve known two such women, both left at the altar in painful fashion. The first was abandoned a week before the wedding and she counts herself lucky, because she wasn’t dressed up in her wedding dress and she wasn’t waiting to walk down the aisle when it happened.
The Unlucky
It’s important to realize that marriage is a valued thing in our society. Too often, we hear about how marriage is under attack or that marriage is no longer valued or a multitude of other arguments. But the simple truth is – we value marriage. We value what it means and when we’re ready to make that commitment, we’re devastated when something goes wrong or when our partner abandons us even before it begins.
Being jilted might be a great place for a romantic heroine to begin her journey in a novel, but it’s hardly the place that any of us want to spend time. Have you known anyone who was left at the altar?
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