I have turned down a couple of job opportunities in the past couple years because accepting the job would mean a move. While we moved when the kids were younger, with all three of them in high school, moving now just doesn’t seem like a good option. Not that I haven’t known plenty of people who have done it—but it seems that moving with kids in high school is much harder on them than a move when they are younger (or waiting to move after the kids have finally graduated.)
As a single parent who shares custody with my children’s father—when I was discussing and entertaining these job offers, one of the options that came up was that while I might move, my kids would choose to remain and stay nearly full-time with their father. Again, this is another option that many families choose, but for me, since I have been the primary parent and involved with my kids on a daily basis for nearly two decades, it wasn’t a personal option that I was willing to consider.
To be fair, I have to admit that I have known some teenagers who loved the opportunity to move and reinvent themselves at a new school and neighborhood. It does give some kids the chance to start over and create a different high school experience in another community. But, for my kids—who have friends, activities, a support-system and a comfort level here in this town that has been their home for over ten years—they would NOT be happy at the prospect of a move.
In my situation, I’ve been able to give it some serious thought and make a choice. Even though it meant passing up the opportunity to make more money and develop my career faster than I’ve been able to otherwise. Some families don’t really have a choice and a move while the kids are still in high school is required. I’d love to hear from others out there who either have an opinion about whether or not a high school move is reasonable, or have experienced it and have some real life experience to share with us about parenting and moving high schoolers to a new community or town…
See Also: The Hidden Expenses of Moving