Perhaps the title of this blog is not as fitting as it seemed a minute ago when I was tapping it out on this page. It may not be perfect, but it is accurate. It’s also a rare event that I would write a blog promoting a handbook about my home state. But this one happens to be peppered quite a number of funny tales that I had to do it (hence the title of my blog).
Author Michael Perkins has penned a book called “Surviving Paradise: True Life and Death Stories of Hawaii’s Hidden Dangers.” You’d be hard pressed to find the humor in that title… and you’d be right. The laughs come when you open the cover and read the well-documented anecdotes from tourists who have survived various hazards while visiting ” The Land of Aloha.”
Let me be perfectly clear—I highly doubt that Perkins meant this book to be a comedy. In fact, the handbook is serious in nature and even offers advice from rescue experts on how to enjoy your trip in the Islands safely. But the fact remains that some of these stories are sadly amusing and they serve as a testament to human folly.
Of course, I was born and raised in Hawaii and am very familiar with all of the sites referenced in the book. Perhaps that’s why when I learn about what has happened to visitors at a specific attraction I can’t help but shake my head and smile a bit (okay, laugh a lot)—but only in some cases–like this one:
A man visiting the Big Island of Hawaii ventured too close to the edge of a steaming lava pit and his baseball hat fell in. Genius then climbs into the 400-foot caldera to retrieve it. According to the book, the only reason the man survived was because his clothes hooked onto a tree branch and rangers were able to lift him out.
Other stories are less amusing (though I know some people who have chuckled after reading them). For instance, there is the true story of a male visitor who was showing off for a girl at the Halona Blowhole. He misjudged his footing and timing and was blasted out to sea, where he drowned. According to the book, the man’s parents later sued the city and state for not posting sufficiently prominent warning signs, but as one city employee remarked, “There will always be someone who ignores (them), hops over barriers, and disregards caution.”
Along with the sometimes-tragic stories the book also offers advice regarding volcanoes, surfing, helicopter crashes, flash floods, sharks, tsunamis and traffic. Whether or not people heed it is another story.
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