When it comes down to opposites attracting, we talked about emphasizing the other’s strengths by letting them take the lead in certain areas. However, there’s more that you can both do. One of the things about my husband I have always admired was his ability to look at the positive side of people. I’m a cynic by nature. It surprises some people when I say that because I am great at offering a positive outlook, however I am not quite so positive internally.
When your partner has strengths that you do not, use them as a mirror not to reflect your weaknesses, but to encourage yourself to grow stronger in those areas. For example, my husband went back to school because my love for education. That’s not the entirety of the reason, but I believe you can do anything you set your mind to and if you don’t know what you ultimately want to do, an education can help you discover new things about yourself.
That’s a pretty strong motivator for him. By the same token, the fact that he always looks on the positive side of people is a strong motivator for me to make more of an effort and be less judgmental. By using your spouse’s strong points as a positive motivator to stimulate growth in yourself.
It’s unfortunate when a couple doesn’t take these opportunities to promote growth in themselves. They can achieve a great deal by using their spouses strengths to encourage them. When you become overly reliant on the other person’s strengths, it can leave you feel inadequate or worse pressured. This is not a positive situation for anything except resentment to grow in.
Now – does that mean I am ever going to be truly mechanically inclined? Unlikely, but I do know how to put a fence board back up and I can certainly put together a computer. I’m nowhere near as fast as he is, but I can do it and that’s something I couldn’t have done before.