My children had to deal with a new, difficult experience this week. We had all gone out together on a family trip, and when we returned home, my son made a discovery that was going to be very disturbing to our children. He came out from his room, and told my wife and I that one of his turtles looked funny. My wife and I exchanged concerned glances. He has been the proud owner of two red eared slider turtles, but ever since we had bought them, one turtle had never eaten very much, nor had it grown at all. As we walked to my son’s room, I felt sure that this smaller turtle must have been sick, and I was worried that it had died.
When we got to the bedroom, and looked at the tank, the first thing that I noticed was that the thermometer showed that the water in the turtles’ tank was too cold. This gave me a moment’s hope. Since turtles are reptiles, if their environment is a little too cold they become sluggish and unenergetic. If this was the case, then simply raising the temperature of the tank’s water would invigorate the turtles.
To my surprise, it was the larger turtle that looked strange. It was floating, totally still, at the top of the water. The smaller turtle was moving slowly, but that looked hopeful to me. When we poured some warmer, treated water into the tank, the smaller turtle perked up immediately. The larger turtle showed no change. It looked dead to my wife and I. My son, fearing the same conclusion, wasn’t ready to give up. He reasoned, “Since it’s a bigger turtle, maybe it needs MORE warm water to help it wake up.”
Now there are several ways that a parent can respond in a situation like this. You can be up front and honest with your child, you can sugar coat the reality of death or with a simple pet like a turtle, you can outright lie to your child about his pet’s chances while your spouse runs out to find a substitute turtle that looks exactly like the one that died.
Personally, I feel that honesty is always the best policy. I think that being truthful with your child is the best way to build trust with him. It is important to couch the truth in a way that is age appropriate.
Did the turtle perk up? Did we have to have turtle funeral? Come back later to find out.
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How did we come to own the turtles? My wife wrote about this earlier this week in the pets blog. You can read Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3 about lessons from buying a turtle in the ‘hood.
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