Growing up can be daunting, painful, and scary–in addition to being fun and joyous too. Kids get overwhelmed, stressed and feel stuck just like adults do. As parents, we can help our children when they hit bumpy times and are afraid of what is to come by helping them look back and see what they have already accomplished.
Kids tend to be incredibly short-sided. It is just the nature of the developing child to be focused on what is in front of them. The past is gone and the future is sometimes imaginary and unattainable. This can be a great attitude for staying “in the moment” at times, but it can also make it painful and hard when a child is about to embark on a new challenge or adventure. He or she may not be able to think back on all the OTHER times that the challenges have been successfully navigated and only see the troubled waters ahead.
Plus, children’s thinking can be pretty linear and literal. She may not see that starting a new school or going off to middle school is going to be similar to going off to summer camp where she didn’t know anyone. Reminding her how she successfully overcame that insecurity and all the positive things that happened because of her willingness to give it a try can help her to face the upcoming risk.
Just like many adults, kids also don’t always see how much they’ve grown or changed or all the life skills they’ve attained. A child may remember how hard it was to do something a couple years ago, or a scary plane ride when he was five–and not realize that he is now five or six years older and a stronger, more experienced person. Parents can help kids bolster the confidence they need to face new challenges by helping them see how far they have already come.
Also: Why Dealing With Our Kids’ Feelings Can Be Difficult
Child-Sized Vs. Adult-Sized–Which is Better?