I am constantly amazed at the way my kids can use denial. Despite being warned and told the consequences of behavior they exhibit or choices they make, they still get quite surprised when things go down the way Mom predicted they might. I do admire their tenacity, however, as they insist upon doing things their way and expecting miraculous results. But, I still can’t help but ask them what they expected to happen differently? How did they not see the inevitable coming?
Of course, when I stop to think about it, I have not completely grown out of this little reality of human nature myself. I still do things hoping and praying for a different outcome than the one I know is written on the wall–not nearly to the extent that my teenagers do, but I do it nonetheless. It gives me compassion, and helps me not to let myself get too agitated at my kids’ amazing life choices.
I remember years ago when my kids were still in elementary school–my middle daughter was clowning around with some friends and they discovered that if you pinch the sides of those cone-shaped pencil topping erasers, a suction can be created. She took an entire package and suctioned them all over her face–to the delight and admiration of her friends. Needless to say, when she pulled off all the little erasers, she had red suction-circles (sort of like faint, round hickies) all over her face. She had those circles for about 3 or 4 days before they finally faded away and people could stop asking her what sort of dreadful disease or accident she was recovering from. I couldn’t help but ask her, incredulously, “What did you think would happen when you stuck all those things to your face?”
Now that they are older, I guess I expect more “adult” behavior from them. But they are NOT adults and while they may show shimmers of maturity, I am constantly amazed at the choices teenagers can make and then be surprised at the inevitable outcome. I’m afraid I cannot tell you what they EXPECTED to happen, but I know how often I have heard “I don’t know why I did it, I thought it would be chill…”
Also: Help Your Kids See How Far They’ve Come
Child-Sized Vs. Adult-Sized–Which is Better?
Older Teens Really DON’T Come With Parenting Manuals