As parents, we have heard how important it is for us to be consistent with our children. Setting limits and establishing rules and then sticking to consistent reactions and consequences is what it is all about when it comes to solid parenting. If you are expecting that same consistent behavior from your child, however, you may have a long, long wait…
With many children, consistency definitely does NOT go both ways…in fact, if your children are anything like mine—just when you think you have got their behaviors figured out and come up with a reasonable response, they change; just when you have figured out what foods they like, they will suddenly inform you that they “hate it” and you can’t get them to eat the former favorite for all the world!
The same can be said for discipline and consequences. I learned long ago not to expect any particular form of discipline or snazzy consequence that I came up with to last forever. I think my kids just build up some sort of immunity. Things change, their interests and what is important (or not important) to them changes too. Therefore, sending them to their room might work well for a ten-year-old, but by the time they are thirteen—you just wish they would come OUT of their room once in a while!
As we get to know our children and their personalities, we can get a pretty good idea of what will or will not work and what is or is not something that seems “in character.” I have a good, general understanding of what seems typical for each of my children, but that does not mean they don’t still surprise me from time to time. While they can pretty much set their clocks by me and my behavior, they still have the ability to throw me for a loop with theirs!
Also: Consistency is Big for Single Parents Too
Do We Expect More Responsibility From Our Kids?