Monday night I had my end of the season tournament for the volleyball league I play on. It can be a long night, depending on how many teams are playing and how many points each match goes to. However, I enjoy it because I get to catch up with friends.
Such as my friend Chris. We met at the beginning of last summer on Tuesday nights, when a bunch of us get together and play sand volleyball in one of the local parks with a group called Team Green.
Chris and I hit it off right away. He’s easy to talk to, funny, and fun to be around. I hadn’t seen much of him since the end of the summer season, though, because I thought we were moving and hadn’t signed up to play as much as I had been.
Anyway, Monday night we had a chance to chat for a bit. I always get a kick out of talking to him because he’s always planning something. Last summer it was a trip to Alaska. In early fall he was talking about heading to Belize this winter. Most recently I knew he’d been thinking about returning to school to get a nursing degree.
On Monday I asked him how his school plans were going. He said he was in the process of figuring that all out. The nursing program he wants to enter doesn’t start again until next October, but he’s also been considering computers. He’s interested in both, but stumped which route to go.
I asked why and that’s when he surprised me:
“Well, you see I just turned 30. I’d like to get married and have kids one day, but I’d like to do that by the time I’m 35. At least get married, then maybe travel a bit before we have kids.
“So there’s the problem. If I do the nursing program it’s only two years. I’d be 32 and still have time to find a wife before I’m 35. Computers will take me four years, putting me at 34. That’s not leaving me much time to meet my deadline.
“Also, I know if I do the nursing I’ll for sure find someone there. But I’d really like to get my degree first before I make any commitments to anyone.”
I was astonished. I’d known plenty of girl friends who’d had life plans: get their degree by 22, get their career going by 25, meet the man of their dreams by 30, marry soon thereafter, kids between 32 and 35. And they’d been that specific with their timeline.
Never had I ran across a man with a plan like that.
Nor had I met any who already knew they wanted to be a dad before they met their wife.
And what’s funny, I can see his dilemma. Many of his friends and the girls he dates do happen to be nurses or doctors, even though currently he’s not working in that field. He just attracts them, which is why I’m convinced in a school full of nurses-in-training he’ll have no trouble finding a potential wife. (Not that he’s a Casanova but he’s one of those good looking, smart, charismatic, nice guys who doesn’t have much trouble meeting women anyway.)
It’ll be interesting to see what happens. Some of my friends with plans have successfully stuck to them, others haven’t.
But I suppose some kind of plan is better than no plan!
Question to Readers
Did you have a plan? Did you know by what age you’d want to get married? Do you know if your spouse did?
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