Yes, we are a peculiar people. It’s okay if you think that—we’re used to it.
More evidence we are peculiar is the fact that we encourage our teenagers not to date until they are sixteen. Why do we do that?
As Latter-day Saints, we take the admonition to stay morally clean very seriously. We consider premarital sex and promiscuity to be sins and we strive to avoid those mistakes. By asking our teenagers to refrain from dating until they are sixteen, we are giving them the chance to develop a bit more maturity, both mentally and spiritually, before introducing them to potentially tempting situations.
Usually, by the time a teen has reached the age of sixteen, he’s had the chance to interact with girls on friendly terms but not in a romantic setting. He’s perhaps got a job and a driver’s license, both of which add to his maturity level. He’s seen positive examples of man/woman relationships, hopefully in his own home, and knows how to treat a date. He’s had many Family Home Evening lessons about the sanctity of the body and he knows he should not abuse that sacred procreative power. (Of course, all this goes for girls too – I use “he” to simplify.)
In some households, parents encourage their teens to group date before they single date. This is a good way for the teen to decide if they like their date enough to have a good time without another couple there to act as a buffer. It also helps them decide if they trust each other enough to spend time alone together. In our house, we’ve decided that our children will double date until they are eighteen, and then they may single date. Every family needs to decide for themselves just how they want to administrate dating rules in their own home. Many families opt to keep a baseball bat in the front hall closet. We’ll be incorporating that as well – our daughter will be very pretty when she’s sixteen.
We believe that moral cleanliness leads to internal peace and confidence, and this is a gift we want for all our teens. And that is why we encourage dating after the age of sixteen, and not before.
Related Blogs:
Please, No Zits! and other short stories for LDS youth