No doubt that you, like most parents, have quite an arsenal of parenting tips and techniques. It does not seem to take long for the average parent to get quite a toolbox to access whenever something pops up with one of their children. Many of us don’t think of ways to shake things up, however, and we can become quite predictable. This can give our kids a better chance at figuring us out and getting a step ahead. Instead of always pulling out the same techniques and consequences for the same misdemeanors, how about mixing things up and combining techniques for effectiveness and the element of surprise?
For example, your child comes home late or forgets to call so you ground him or her. Or perhaps you use grounding and restriction as the end-all disciplinary technique for everything from a messy room to missed curfew. How about shaking things up? What if the child had to do a chore for every minute he or she was late or had to spend time doing extra-credit work to make up for an infraction. Maybe doing the grocery shopping or helping clean the garage could be a consequence of something else too?
Instead of always using consequences, you might consider other techniques—a surprise reward for doing something that you didn’t have to harass him about or a trip out to dinner for no reason at all. You can also combine different techniques if you are feeling really creative. Keeping an element of surprise in your parenting techniques not only helps you stay a step ahead—but it may also help you to feel more effective or at least keep you (or your child) from getting bored and feeling ineffective. Instead of allowing yourself to be so predictable, explore some new ways of combining techniques and see if your parenting isn’t more influential.