Unfortunately, spending time in court can be part of the experience of many single parents. Some of us get off easily with simple divorce proceedings while others of us may have on-going custody battles or have to work things out in front of a judge because they cannot be worked out in any other way. When we think we have finished with the court appearances and court battles, however, and we suddenly find ourselves BACK in front of a judge, it can be disheartening, stressful and emotional.
Years may have passed since you were in a courtroom and suddenly you need to collect past child support or your ex wants to make changes to the custody agreements. Sometimes there are lingering financial or property issues that need to be resolved or other legal issues that pop up and we find ourselves heading back to court. For many of us this can stir up emotions and stress that we were happy having buried.
Try to take things in stride and definitely seek a healthy outlet for the stress. Talk to a counselor, trusted friend or family member and share your fears and concerns. If you try to keep them all bottled up inside, they may erupt in inappropriate ways. Take special care of yourself during the stressful time—instead of turning to alcohol or unhealthy coping strategies, get extra sleep, take yourself for walks or to the spa, and put extra attention into self-care to combat the added stress.
Look for pleasures and enjoy your children. Often when we find ourselves back in court or facing other stressors, we ignore or turn away from our families just when we could really use the pleasure and support.
Finally, try to minimize other changes and stresses when you are faced with legal battles. This is not the time to buy a new house or move or change jobs. Let the legal challenges get taken care of before embarking on other major life changes.