Have you ever seen a cartoon or a comic strip featuring some poor soul who has a black cloud overhead following him (or her) wherever he (or she) goes? They can’t get a break. Everywhere they turn, everything they do, doom awaits.
I’ve had days where I’ve felt like that. Days where no matter what I try, I can’t shake the black cloud. I know Wayne has too. Usually we don’t experience it at the same time, though, so whoever’s got the sun on their side tries to stand as close as possible to the other. That way we can share whatever rays we can and remind the other that eventually the cloud will disperse.
Prior to this year I’ve only known black cloud days here and there. Then this year happened and it seems the black cloud days are the rule and the sunshine ones the exception.
One Black Cloud Day After the Other
It started when my mom got sick and we moved her in with us. Then came the car accident, my mom’s first stroke that made caring for her even more challenging, and my marriage started to suffer for it. Then I lost the diamond in my ring, followed the very next day by the oncologist telling us the cancer drug wasn’t working and my mom had a month to live. Just three weeks after that, my mom died.
We thought taking a vacation might help. But we came back to a hurt Murph who needed surgery on his paw. And, then, just when I thought maybe I was done and things would start getting better, of all the years to do it, Wayne picked this one to forget our anniversary. A few weeks after that, my cousin informed me her mom’s hysterectomy revealed fallopian tube cancer. Now we’re waiting to see how she’s going to fare with that.
To say it’s been a rough year is an understatement. It’s been a freaking black cloud year.
Letting Sleeping Vipers Lie
Then Monday happened. I got an interesting call from the people who bought our house in Jacksonville. When I hung up with them, I immediately called Wayne to give him the low down. (Long story short, they’re having even more problems with one set of neighbors than we did and are in the process of hiring a lawyer to sue them. They wanted a statement from us detailing our problems with the neighbors to help their case.)
“Just stay out of it,” he groaned. “We’ve had enough black clouds as it is this year. I have a feeling if we get involved, we’re just going to provoke more problems. Let sleeping vipers lie.” He ended with vehemently declaring, “Man, I just wish the sun would come back out. Maybe it would help if you didn’t answer the phone anymore. It’s never good news.”
Since I can’t make the sun appear, nor can I ignore the phone forever, the best I can do is try to cope. Because I’ve had a lot of practice at it this year, I actually have found some techniques that have helped my marriage weather these stormy days. Tomorrow I’ll talk about them.
Courtney Mroch writes about animals great and small in Pets and the harmony and strife that encompasses married life in Marriage. For a full listing of her articles click here.
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