While we are expecting the birth of our first child my wife and I are finding some rather interesting and low stress ways to spend time with one another. These are quite simple but also invaluable to our marriage and her overall sense of well-being during the final trimester in the heat of Texas!
One of the things my wife and I have been bad about is treating meals as a sacrosanct family time. This was partly because she comes from a large family and finds cooking for only two a difficult task. In addition to this fact both of us are generally exhausted and find any dinner requiring preparation after a full day of work generally too taxing. This has been compounded by my work taking place during the day and also during the evening (as I am involved in the theatre).
One piece of advice which has helped my wife immensely came from our midwife who pointed out a lack of protein in her diet during the 2nd trimester. This led my wife to demand a breakfast of scrambled eggs every morning. Since she was still working as a high school teacher at the time the breakfast preparation was left to me. This has created a very valuable situation: we eat breakfast together every morning.
The other thing my wife and I have been unable to find time for was exercise. Her work as a high school teacher and her volunteer activities left little room for scheduled exercise. Similarly, the increasing time demands of my courses in reading and writing (two very immobile activities) had led the both of us to be couch potatoes though we don’t even own a television!
The added bonus of getting up early to make breakfast has motivated us to take walks together. Granted, these walks are not the type or amount of strenuous activity I need, but for my wife the walking is quite relaxing and it certainly has its benefits for me as well. Most importantly we’ve carved out some time for ourselves when the whole family is together. Perhaps our son will even be familiar with my voice when he’s born.
Since the summer has started and our major time depriving occupations have largely subsided we’ve been more readily able to keep eating and walking together each day. Our hope is that these activities will continue both after the birth of our child and when the school year begins again.
A question to parents (especially fathers) with major time constraints: What do you do to spend time together as a family? How do you keep those little rituals protected from the demands and responsibilities outside the home? Please put your helpful tips in the comments below. They will be very much appreciated by all new fathers.