Marriage is just a piece of paper.
Marriage is a contract. A binding contract. Imagine if you wanted to buy a house or a car or any other major purchase. You need to sign a contract. You make a commitment to it. Marriage is no different in that it is a commitment to one person. That piece of paper is a contract made before witnesses and before God if you are believers that you promise to commit totally to your spouse for your lifetime. It is as binding as any other contract, though unlike some contracts it doesn’t come with a few day cooling off period.
Living together before marriage improves your chances of a happy marriage.
This try before you buy philosophy is often closely linked to the point above. It is a lie that has been fed to us over a number of years. While you might expect that this would improve your chances in marriage, statistics show the opposite is true. Marriages where couples live together first are more prone to end up in divorce after marriage.
Love conquers all.
Maybe in fairy tales, romance novels and romantic movies it does. But not in reality. The reality is you have to be more than in love with the person you are marrying. You have to like and respect them, to enjoy spending time with them and have their best interests at heart. You also need common interests.
Good sex is all important.
If you watch current movies and TV shows, you could be forgiven for thinking it is the only important aspect of a relationship. While I agree it is important, good sex means nothing unless there is that deep emotional involvement and care for the other person and their needs. And unless there are other positive aspects in the marriage like love, respect, common interests, similar core values etc.
Children will keep a marriage together.
If it’s already a good marriage, children are a great blessing and can add another dimension to a marriage. If it’s already on shaky ground, children are likely to make the situation worse and introduce even more stress.
Being married to someone is better than staying single.
Marriage should never be seen as a last resort. Marry only if you can’t imagine living without that person and if they feel the same. It’s better to stay single that plunge into a marriage you’re not wholly committed to. Why make two people miserable?
Join me tomorrow as I look at more lies society has fed us about marriage.
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