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Thinking About Marrying An Unbeliever?

Thinking about marrying an unbeliever? Think again. Think long and hard, because it is setting yourself up for a hard time. So why shouldn’t you marry an unbeliever?

Firstly, if you are a Christian, it goes against what the bible, which is the Christian’s guideline for living and the Maker’s manual, teaches. 2 Corinthians 6:14-15, says ‘Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light and Darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever?’

Christians are called to be obedient to God and to His Word, so, to marry an unbeliever when you are Christian is being disobedient. It also is setting yourself up and saying you know more than God does. When God gives rules, commandments, guidelines they are for a reason- not because He’s a kill joy but for our own good. It is also setting yourself for a life of heartache. It’s extremely hard when you cannot share the most important thing in your life with your spouse.

I’ve seen any number of women who have struggled in this area. Because of an unbelieving husband they are often less involved in church activities and find it church life hard. Other times the husband becomes resentful of the church life and her involvement and will try and do everything to stop the wife attending church or bible study etc, It happens occasionally where the man is the believer and the wife is not a believer and refuses to come to church or tries to interfere but it is nowhere near as common.

Often what happens is it not only affects the marriage but the family as well. If a child sees Dad doesn’t go to church the children, and particularly sons, might see no reason then why they should go either. So families are split even further.

Yes there have been cases where the unbeliever has come to faith through God’s grace and the example set by their spouse. But, and it is a big but, there are not as common. More often what happens is that the church going partner is the one who changes to accommodate their partner and often the children as well. They stop going to church because it is all too hard. Because the spouse and family want to do other things on Sundays. It’s easier to avoid the heartache and the conflict by not putting yourself in that situation.

Marriage is meant to be unity and oneness, not disharmony and strife.

Bible verses from The New American Standard Version

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