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Keeping the Lines Open

Silence is not always a bad thing. Sometimes you can spend time with someone you love, completely comfortable in their company without any words being spoken at all. But silence is not always good.

In marriage it is important to keep the lines of communication open. How often have you seen a movie and the couple who are obviously long married are sitting in silence across from each other? How often have you also seen it in real life? The assumption is people who have been married a long time have nothing left to talk about.

This morning Mick and I went for a walk along the beach and we talked. We talked about things happening in the news, politics, health issues, local news, attitudes in society, and the war in Afghanistan. As well as those topical things we talked about my upcoming book launch, the weather, about our little dog who loves to run around us on the beach and various other topics.

It doesn’t really matter what you talk about, so long as you are keeping the lines of communication open. Some suggestions of things to talk about just to get the ball rolling are memories of fun times together and special celebrations. Even memories of the hard times can be helpful to talk about. Sometimes we don’t feel like talking much about them at the time but later on might be happy to talk about them. Distance often adds perspective. When our daughter was critically ill some years back she refused to talk about it afterwards when she was well again. It was like those weeks didn’t exist. She blanked them out. Now she can talk about it and see how her experience can be helpful in dealing with other people and their problems.

Talking about your hard times with your spouse can be beneficial in gaining perspective on events and seeing how you got through those times and are still together.

Join me tomorrow for some more suggestions about keeping the line of communication open.

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