Preschool concerns are normal when a child resists going to school. You may find yourself wondering if your child is adjusting to this new environment. You may wonder if the teacher is doing her job. You may wonder how the other children are treating your child. When is it normal to resist preschool and when should you look for a deeper problem? How much time do you give before taking action? Is your child simply taking longer to adjust than you expect?
Normal separation anxiety: Preschool is a big step for children as for most it is the first time they are apart from their parents and a familiar environment. A child may resist going to preschool for a few days to a few weeks before finally adjusting. The adjustment period should not be mistaken for a child not fitting in to the preschool or something sinister going on in the preschool. Try to ask your child why she does not want to go to school. However, it is also a good idea to ask the teacher how the child behaves during the day. Does your child interact with other children? Does your child interact with the teacher?
Tantrums after school: We all know children act differently when they are out of our care. Most will hold back emotions because they do not feel as comfortable in a different environment around different people as they do at home. If you set a cup under a running facet it will soon overflow. The tantrum is the overflow of emotion. Stay calm. Let the child know you missed her as well and then ask about her day. You may find she is excited to tell you about some fun things she learned or did during the day. You may also learn of an incident with another child. You may not get an answer but that is not a cause for concern.
Teacher concerns: It is hard to hand the reigns over to another person especially when we do not know the person well. It is natural to wonder if the teacher is doing her job or how she is treating your child. To alleviate any concerns try to meet with the teacher before the school year begins. Meeting her will allow you and your child a chance to get comfortable. Ask the teacher if you can visit the classroom for a bit until your child adjusts. Keep in mind, that often this does not work and causes more distraction so a teacher may not feel it is the best method. If she does, that is not a sign something is wrong. Ask if you can peek in without the child knowing you are there for a minute. You want to make sure your child is not wandering around unattended to or not interacting with other students. Communicate with the teacher about your child’s adjustment and the day to day activities. A good preschool teacher is always available for a conversation about your child even if you have to make an appointment.
Preschool can be a scary place. However, after a few weeks if not before it will soon become a magical place your child will enjoy being daily.
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