When the doctor hands our beautiful new baby to us for the first time the teen years are a million miles away. Before you know it, you are parenting a teenager, this is scary uncharted territory. If you are the single parent of a teenager it can seem even more intimidating.
Our kids are in such a hurry to grow up, just like we were, and we have to adapt with their growth. One thing I wasn’t prepared for was Hailey dating. I always thought when the time came her father would be there to lay down the law and talk to the boy before he took our daughter out, you know, a little intimidation by father. Since this wasn’t going to happen, and I’m about as intimidating as a house fly, I had to attack from another direction.
Hailey and I talked for months about dating before it was ever a reality for her. I told her about some of the dates I had recently been on, what I liked about the date, what I didn’t like, and how to behave on a date. For too many teens dating is synonymous with sex so there were lots of talks about respecting yourself and the person you are with, and also about decisions that are better left until you are older.
Make sure you talk a lot before they start dating and have the rules firmly in place. Always know where they are going and who they will be with, most importantly make sure your child has an out. Teach him or her how to end a bad date gracefully so there are no hurt feelings. Dating violence is very common, even in teens, make sure your child knows they can always call you for a ride.
Remind them there is safety in numbers and if their date is drinking or doing anything that makes them uncomfortable you will come get them. This is one time you will be grateful they have a cell phone.
Always be available to talk, be open minded and non judgmental. Try to remember what it was like when you first started dating. They need your guidance and they need you to listen, be willing to do both.