Yesterday was really a bad, bad day. One of my children had decided to throw an absolute tantrum in public that required me to remain absolutely calm and talk him off his high horse while he beat up on his father. Yeah, it was really pretty. We got it all worked out, the kid apologized, and we’ve moved on, but it took such a huge emotional toll on me that when we got home, I told my husband I had to leave for a while. I just had to.
I’m a stay-at-home, work-at-home mom. I homeschool as well. Everything I do is at home. Sure, I go run errands and so forth, but the entire focus of my life is at home, and for the most part, that’s where I’m happiest. But last night, I had to get away. And my husband understood.
There are simply times when wives need a break, and there are times when husbands need a break. When that happens, it’s so important for them to communicate openly with their spouses. I told my husband, “I’m not leaving you. I just need to leave the house, and I will be back.” Sure enough, about three hours later, I came back, and I was much better able to face the home and the family again. Had I not taken that break, I probably would have had a nervous breakdown.
It’s also important for the other spouse to honor what’s being said and to not take it personally. I’m so grateful that my husband just held down the fort, got the kids ready for bed, and supported me in my outing. I didn’t do anything wild and crazy—I just went to Walmart and wandered around (although some people might consider that wild and crazy)—and when I came home, he greeted me lovingly. If he had been resentful, it would have made my burdens so much worse.
So it’s not a crime to need a break. In fact, it can mean all the difference between sanity and insanity. We want our marriages to be healthy, and not insane … let’s do what we can to support our spouses in getting the things they need for optimum emotional health as well as physical.
Related Blogs:
Stop the Yelling Before It Starts
Preventing Meltdowns … For Both of You