A decade ago I began to officially homeschool my oldest daughter. It started a journey that twisted, turned, and brought so much emotion and accomplishment. I was not sure how long I would homeschool when I first began. It was more of an experiment than a conviction at that time. As time went on it became a conviction I held deep in my heart. I know the experience will not mean as much to her, at least now, as it does to me. At any rate, this marks the final year I will homeschool my oldest daughter. The thought of a new transition to high school is bittersweet.
As I end this year, I think back on the last ten years. I think of the times she excelled and the times she struggled. I was there for each of those times. I taught her how to read even when it was difficult and didn’t make sense. I taught her long division and where China is on a map. We spent time doing arts and crafts, narration, nature studies, and documentary afternoons. She has seen me at my best and my worse as I have seen her. She has been helpful, reliable, brilliant, lazy, exhausting, and fussy. The days went by too fast. I would give anything for one more year. I would do better. I would do more. I would still feel like I would do better and do more at the end of that year. I guess you can never spend too much time with your precious ones.
The experience has made me a better homeschooler to my other children. With her leaving for high school, I know I will be more aware of time coming to a close. My son has only two more years at home and I have the illusion of time with a 2nd grader and preschooler at home as well. Every day is a gift. I wasted so many days. So many days not appreciating them and not focusing my efforts as I should have. And guess what? Even if every day was perfect I would feel the same. Yet, from now on the reality of my little birdies flying from home is becoming more real. Enjoy and remember to love them every day.