I am a helicopter parent. I would like to blame that on being a single parent but I think I would have been a helicopter parent no matter what.
They are different schools of thought on this type of hovering, but basically, it is seen as something that interferes with our children’s independence. Because we hover the kids don’t learn to make their own mistakes and fix things, we are always there to jump in and save the day.
Now studies are seeing a new trend, kids who never leave home. This seems to be a result of several things, including the economy and helicopter parents.
Previous generations could not wait to leave home to go to college, get married and start their own lives. This generation seems to be more willing to live at home and let good old Mom and Dad continue to foot the bill.
As a result of the type of parenting that is prevalent today, kids seem unable to make their own decisions and make their way in this world. If you are a single parent it means that once your ex stops being responsible financially for your children, you may still be paying the majority of your adult childrens support.
I can see the effects of my helicopter parenting. I believe that Hailey is more unsure of her abilities than she would have been if I had not hovered. It’s a fine line to walk.
As a single mother I felt like I needed to know where Hailey was and what she was doing in order to make sure she was safe. It was also easier to do things myself than to take the time to teach her to do it and fight about chores.
Now, I wish I had parented differently. I wish I had given Hailey the opportunity to make some mistakes and learn from them. I believe that by rushing in to fix everything for her I have not taught her the value of sticking with something until you get it right.
Hindsight is 20/20 and even when we think we are doing the right thing, sometimes it’s not.