Today, I found an opportunity to practice refraining from instructing Dylan as he plays. We had gone out to pick up a couple of things at the hardware store for my husband and I decided to turn it into a fun afternoon outing by adding in a stop for lunch and a trip to the playground before we went back home. At the restaurant where we had lunch, there were a bunch of plastic and metal food containers on a table with a sign that said “Free For Our Customers”. Of course, the containers caught Dylan’s eye and he picked out a shiny gold can with a plastic lid and a white plastic bucket.
When we returned home later in the afternoon, we went into the yard to play. Dylan took the gold can out of the car and went to play with it. As I said “What are you going to do with your new can?”, I caught myself. I was just about to give a few suggestions for what he could do with the can, such as filling it with rocks, water, or grass. Instead, I waited to see what he would do with it. After all, it is his can.
As I watched Dylan investigate the can, I started to wonder why I have to work so hard at just letting him do his own thing sometimes. After all, when he is playing independently with something safe and he is where I can see him, there is no need for me to involve myself unless he asks me to become involved. Open ended play with items such as the golden metal can gives Dylan an opportunity for creative growth and for experiencing freedom and autonomy. Although it will be an ongoing effort for me to get out of Dylan’s way and just let him play, I feel that it is an effort which is well worth making for both of us.