Sometimes the most difficult part of becoming more like Christ, is making the small every day changes that are necessary. At least, it is for me. I have had the nagging feeling as of late that I need to be better at a lot of things. Yet, sometimes, I feel overwhelmed by the daily task of just accomplishing one of those things. Like, reading my scriptures, for example.
My biggest goal right now is working on using a softer tone when I speak to my children. I read the talk, “Except the Lord Build the House…” by Gordon B. Hinkley from 1971 that spoke of better ways to build a strong home and marriage. It is a great talk. He says, “How much greater the peace in the homes of the people, how much greater the security in the lives of the children, how much less divorce and separation and misery, how much more gladness and joy and love there would be if husbands and wives would cultivate the discipline of speaking softly one to another, and if both would so speak to their children.” And, he goes on to say, “The voice of domestic peace is a gentle voice.” I love that.
I want my children to grow up in a home where they feel peace, happiness, and security. I feel like I am succeeding in some ways. I hear laughter daily from my children, and we give lots of hugs and kisses. We say “I love you” a lot. But, I don’t want my kids to just hear that I love them. I want them to know it by how I speak to them.
Speaking in a soft voice is probably one of my biggest challenges as a mother. I was not raised in an environment where soft voices were always used. My husband was. So, when I feel like I am really being patient, or using a lot of control, sometimes it can still feel, to him, like I am speaking harshly to our children. I do know that every child has a sensitive spirit inside. It is my job to nurture and love them so that their spirit is not damaged by my irritability. It is hard, though.
I feel like accomplishing the goal of eliminating yelling and harsh tones in our family is still a long way off. But, I hope with lots of prayer and strength from my Heavenly Father, I can accomplish that goal one day. How do you keep from yelling?