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Having “The Talk”

Are you uncomfortable talking to your teenager about sex? There can be a variety of reasons that parents feel unease. Uncovering what is causing your discomfort can make “the talk” easier.

One of the things that can be difficult is talking to a child of the opposite sex. It is usually best if moms talk to their daughters and fathers to their sons. But if that isn’t possible, for whatever reason, don’t let that stop you from discussing the topic.

I knew that I had to be the one to have “the talk” with my oldest son. My husband had no problem handing over those reins. But it wasn’t so bad with him because he has always been easy to talk to. He is very candid with me.

Now talking to my youngest son was much more uncomfortable. He doesn’t say much. We jokingly call him the “clam” because of that.

So in addition to it being an issue of gender, your child’s personality can sometimes make it difficult to address this subject matter. But those are easy issues to get past.

It gets more difficult if your reason for feeling uncomfortable is that your past isn’t something you are proud of. You might be afraid your child will ask questions. Then you will either have to lie or be honest. As a result, you risk the whole, “Well you did it, so why can’t I?”

Honesty isn’t always easy but it is always best. Hopefully any mistakes you made in your past resulted in lessons that can be shared with your teen.

Trying to pretend to be someone you aren’t isn’t keeping things real. And that’s what our children need.

If the problem is that you just don’t know what to say or how much, do some research. Find information that is age-appropriate. But don’t forget to go with your gut if you have concerns about a particular topic that you know needs to be addressed.

Sometimes we have to just push through the discomfort. In the end you will be glad you did.

Related Articles:

Talking to Your Teen About Sex

Consequences of Sexting

Teens Views on Sex

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About Stephanie Romero

Stephanie Romero is a professional blogger for Families and full-time web content writer. She is the author and instructor of an online course, "Recovery from Abuse," which is currently being used in a prison as part of a character-based program. She has been married to her husband Dan for 21 years and is the mother of two teenage children who live at home and one who is serving in the Air Force.