I have a friend who was a rather reluctant grandmother. Having raised her daughter on her own as a single mother for her entire growing-up years, she knew first-hand the limitations and challenges of being a parent. She understandably wanted something different for her own daughter and was thrilled and excited to launch her into the world to pursue her passion and talent for music in college. A few years later, the daughter had partnered and was expecting her first child. My friend was less than thrilled. Okay, to be honest, she flat-out refused to take on the traditional role of “grandmother.” I remember attending the baby shower where my young, hip-looking friend was wearing her black Rolling Stones t-shirt newly purchased from the recent concert tour (where she had sat in fifth-row seats) and declaring that the baby was NOT going to call her “grandmother!”
Well, fast forward a couple more years and my friend is still wearing her concert t-shirts, but she is now “Nana” to her beloved and precocious granddaughter. With trips to the park and adventures and afternoon babysitting, she’s definitely relishing the role of nurturing another generation. Recently, she was sharing with me that she had kept her 2-year-old granddaughter over night for a couple nights and, since the child was used to nursing before going to bed every night, she’d been concerned that bedtime would be a nightmare. Resourceful and desperate, she decided to use the same relaxation tape her therapist had provided to help her relax and decompress from her stressful government job.
“We’re going to get calm and relaxed,” she announced and told me her granddaughter had so loved the way those words sounded together that she started chanting in her mousy two-year-old voice– “calm and relaxed.” As they lay side-by-side on Nana’s big bed, the relaxation tape playing–the novelty and the smooth, calming voice over even more calming nature sounds did the trick. No nursing needed and her grandchild konked off to sleep. So, I’m passing along a bedtime tip from a hip, new-age grandmother–try relaxation tapes…