Our house is now extremely peaceful at night. The last time I updated on our sleep training adventures, my son was still crying at bed time. I am happy to report that each night at 6:45pm, my son goes down in his crib very sleepy yet awake, and he goes to sleep without shedding a single tear.
We have taken a few different approaches from different experts. It takes about three days for our son to get into a rhythm. We had a beautiful schedule but had to start from scratch once we came back from an extended visit with the grandparents. We have found that the first night, extinction is the only method that will work. Extinction is a fancy word for “leave them in the crib no matter what and don’t go back until it’s time for them to wake up.” Unfortunately he will scream very hard, quite angrily, for about 20 minutes. Attempts to soothe him make him even more upset, he calms down and sleeps much more quickly when left alone. The second night I’ll put him down and stay by his crib. He’ll squeeze my finger until he falls asleep. It takes him about five to ten minutes. He whimpers a little but he doesn’t cry too much. The third night he will immediately close his eyes once his head touches the crib and he is tucked in tight.
It took a lot of experimenting with time and routine to get to this point. We started out with a bedtime of about 7:30 but we quickly realized that he was overtired by this point. We moved the time up by 15 minutes until we discovered that 6:45 is the magic number for our son. Our bedtime routine begins at 6pm with a bath. Then we dress him in his pajamas and I nurse him until he is totally relaxed and nearly sleeping. I give him a little pat on the back before I lay him down and swaddle him. As long as his arms are tucked in and he has his pacifier, he’ll go to sleep right away. It seems almost too easy to us now!
Now that our son has an early bedtime and does not need to be bounced until he is completely asleep, he is much more rested and we have been able to reclaim our night life. I wake up to the sounds of a cheerful baby in the morning. He is bright and energetic and he has been trying new skills with much more patience! My husband and I are much less stressed out and have been able to spend a lot more quality time together. I also appreciate the fact that I can now get things done at night and still go to bed at a decent hour. I am free to enjoy our playtime together during the day because I know I will have time to clean up and do my work after he goes to sleep. I can use his nap time to rest rather than squeeze in 2 hours of housework into 30 minutes. Even though it’s really hard to listen to my son wail the first night or two, the result is worth it. We are all much happier!