We all know how this goes—we are the parents and we know what is right and good and our children need us to guide and teach them. Sometimes, however, our kids have some ideas of their own. Sometimes, they even have some pretty darn good ideas about how to make things better or change the way things are done. This is when we parents have to set our pride aside and allow our kids to have influence—it is good for both of us!
There is a difference between letting a very young child run roughshod over the family and permitting a complete disregard for rules, regulations and structure and giving in to a child’s good idea for how to improve or change things in the way the family operates. For example, let’s say that you always do your grocery shopping on weekdays on the way home from work. Perhaps you started this years ago due to family schedules or simply because it seemed more efficient at the time. Your ten year-old suggests, however, that you try doing the grocery shopping on Saturday nights because he has a friend whose parents shop at this time and they say there are no crowds and it does not cut into other activities. Why NOT try making a switch to see how it works? Just because you have “always” done something a certain way does not mean there is not room for improvement. There is also no reason why your child cannot be the person who offers ideas for how to improve and change things.
Allowing kids to share their ideas and allowing them influence on making changes and improvements to the family does several things—it helps kids to feel like they are truly a valuable part of the family and it encourages problem-solving and creativity skills; It can also bond you more as a family and help you as a parent support your child’s movement toward independence. Finally, it can also make your family run smoother and help you make positive adjustments to how things are done!
See Also: Letting Kids Decorate Their Way