As a single parent, when little trick-or-treaters show up at your door and your own little trick-or-treater is away at his other parent’s for the night it can be especially difficult. Before you became a parent you dreamed of nights like this, never expecting to miss out on them every other year. I have been lucky enough that I have always gotten to see Logan on the holidays. His dad and I have always split them so that Logan had the opportunity to see both of us on every single holiday, but from the sound of it, I may not have this luxury for much longer. I have to admit, at first the thought of this was rather frightening to me. My whole identity is wrapped up in being a mother, I’m not sure what to do with myself when I don’t have my little Logan by my side. Everything I do revolves around him, so the thought of not seeing him every holiday makes my heart sink.
I’ve enjoyed the fact that Logan gets to see both of us on these special days, but if this does come to an end and we are forced to go to a typical divorce schedule, I won’t let it ruin the holidays for us. Logan and I will still celebrate the holidays just the two of us. It may not be on the exact day, but we will still celebrate.
As for me, I am going to keep myself busy and have some things that I can look forward to while he is at his dad’s. There are lots of fun things for adults around Halloween and I have a great group of friends that makes it easier to cope with our time apart. It is important to have a good support system on days like this. Go out and have some fun, or if you don’t feel much like going out, take some time to do something for you while your kids are away. Draw a nice bubble bath, light some candles, turn on some music, read a book, or watch a movie, all without the interruption of little kids running around. It is always hard not to have your kids with you, but if they are going to be gone anyway, you might as well use the time to do the little luxuries you miss out on during the week.