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Apples to Apples


As women, we are pros at comparing things; houses, clothes, shoes, weight, kids, jobs, parenting, you name it, we’ve compared it. When we spend our days comparing our lives to that of others it doesn’t take long before we, ourselves, feel inadequate in every aspect of our lives. What we forget is that we are comparing everybody else’s highlight reel to our “behind-the-scenes.” Someone who may seem like the World’s Greatest Mom on Facebook, may in reality be falling apart at the seams at home. When you see your friend who lives in that beautiful mansion across town, you may not see that she is struggling with an unfaithful husband and doing everything she can to keep her family together.

I remember going out with a good friend of mine about two months before my divorce. She kept saying how for so long she had envied my life. I was married, living on my own, and had a cute little boy who everyone seemed to adore. From the outside, it looked like I had it made. Little did she know that I too was dealing with an unfaithful husband and a marriage that was falling apart. I was struggling to raise that sweet little boy on my own and spent my days cleaning and taking care of a baby only to start all over the next day. My only conversation was with a two year old. I craved other interactions, but was too afraid that my secret would be out. From the outside looking in, people thought I had the perfect life, but it was far from it.

Instead of constantly comparing ourselves to those around us, we need to focus on our own lives and what we can do to make it better. If we compare our weaknesses to other’s strengths we will get nowhere. We have to find ways to turn our own weaknesses into strengths and develop our own talents. We don’t know what is happening “behind-the-scenes” for other people. We need to be comparing apples to apples…on second thought, let’s just quit comparing all together!

This entry was posted in Children of Divorce by Sarah Williams. Bookmark the permalink.

About Sarah Williams

I am a single mother to a sweet little 4 year old boy named Logan. I am almost done with my degree in Elementary Education and have loved every second of it. I love writing for Families.com and hope to be able to help other single moms through the difficulties of raising a child on your own.