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Are We Too Dependent On Marriage?

This is a bit of a weird question, but I was reading a variety of different articles in other areas over the last couple of days and one of the themes they seem to be arguing is that we as a society are too dependent on marriage for our individual happiness. Whether we are married or not, a barometer of social satisfaction and happiness seems to be based on marriage.

For Example, The Decline in Marriage Percentages

Reports that show married couples comprising only 50% of households seemed to be disheartening to some. What’s wrong with marriage? We’re all looking for the answer to be framed in a way we can understand. Is it the presence of same-sex unions? Is it the ease of divorce? Is it the growth of couples who cohabitate but do not marry? Is it a sign of our social decline? What is wrong with us? What is wrong with our marriages?

I’d like to take a moment to submit a controversial thought. I don’t think anything is wrong with our marriages. I think our perceptions and expectations are skewed. I think we are looking for personal satisfaction and definition in the same places we find our entertainment.

In the 80s, the problem was that we all viewed marriage as we thought it should be — through the eyes of a 1950s television show like Father Knows Best, but the reality is that in the 1950s, marriages had their own set of problems and they were just as likely wishing they had that Father Knows Best relationship too.

Marriage Is Work, But It’s Not the Single Source for Satisfaction

Our self-image as a society is hard to define because we are a conglomerate of different ethnicities, religions, sexual-orientations and generations. What is satisfying for me is not going to satisfy my neighbor and vice-versa. But I think too often, we are dependent on this ideal we have of marriage and when that happens, we cause ourselves problems. We create the very problems we don’t want to have.

Instead of seeing things as they are, enjoying the good and repairing the bad, we see them as we think they should be – an ideal – and it’s very hard to live up to an ideal.

Do you think we’re too dependent on marriage?

Related Articles:

Are You The Ham or the Eggs?

Marriage Tips: Make Love Your Decision

Is Divorce What’s Wrong with Marriage?

By Juno! Happily Ever After & Going Strong

This entry was posted in Outside Influences and tagged , , , by Heather Long. Bookmark the permalink.

About Heather Long

Heather Long is 35 years old and currently lives in Wylie, Texas. She has been a freelance writer for six years. Her husband and she met while working together at America Online over ten years ago. They have a beautiful daughter who just turned five years old. She is learning to read and preparing for kindergarten in the fall. An author of more than 300 articles and 500+ web copy pieces, Heather has also written three books as a ghostwriter. Empty Canoe Publishing accepted a novel of her own. A former horse breeder, Heather used to get most of her exercise outside. In late 2004, early 2005 Heather started studying fitness full time in order to get herself back into shape. Heather worked with a personal trainer for six months and works out regularly. She enjoys shaking up her routine and checking out new exercises. Her current favorites are the treadmill (she walks up to 90 minutes daily) and doing yoga for stretching. She also performs strength training two to three times a week. Her goals include performing in a marathon such as the Walk for Breast Cancer Awareness or Team in Training for Lymphoma research. She enjoys sharing her knowledge and experience through the fitness and marriage blogs.