In a previous blog, I reviewed the book Real Moms, by Elisa Morgan and Carol Kuykendall. In the book the authors point out that perfection is impossible and unattainable. If you missed the previous blog, please go back and read if for more information. In a chapter titled, Doin’ My Best Mom: Real Moms Are Perfect and Don’t Have Perfect Children, the authors ask the question, “Are you a perfectionist?” If you’re not sure take this quiz to find out.
You might be a perfectionist if you:
Are quicker to dwell on your failures than on your successes,
Believe that if something is worth doing, it’s worth doing well,
Fear the possibility that you may fail,
Need to get all A’s, a C-plus won’t cut it, and
Are bothered if you put a stamp on crooked.
So how did you do? If you find that you do indeed have perfectionist tendencies the authors offer these prescriptions for a speedy recovery.
First, realize that some things aren’t worth the time and energy you exert on them. In fact, some actually take time away from higher-priority activities.
You should try to set a reasonable amount of time to complete a task and then make yourself stick to the deadline.
Give yourself permission to decide what is important and in some cases you have to simply lower your standards.
And go ahead and put that stamp on crooked! I admit sometimes my stamps are not only crooked but upside down as well.
If you have a few minutes take time to reflect on these two questions and be totally honest with your answers (you don’t have to share them with anyone but yourself).
1. What aspects of mothering are important or interesting to you?
2. What aspects of mothering are not important or interesting to you?
Finally, here are some more of those little gems that the authors sprinkle throughout the book.
Real moms:
Watch Martha Stewart; that’s all– they just watch her.
Shove all the dirty dishes in the oven when unexpected guests arrive.
Like to drink orange juice out of the carton when the kids aren’t looking.
Make mistakes on a daily basis but keeps on chugging along, trying to get better.