I have to confess, that for all my cynicism and pessimism, I’m a hopeless romantic. I love films like Sleepless in Seattle and Casablanca. I love the idea of being swept off my feet. I think love should be passionate and enticing, beautiful, funny and so much more. I think love is powerful when it’s fresh and new and exciting and I think it’s incredibly sexy ten years into the relationship when you share not only passion, but also history and the promise of more.
Being romantic can be hard. I used to fall for people all the time. I’d make fast and immediate connections with others and I always seemed to get carried away by sentiment and more. That romantic streak put me on the wrong path more than once. I’d fall for guys that just weren’t worth it and I’d care for others, but not feel that romantic spark that I needed.
I never wanted to be popular in general, but rather I longed to be popular with one person. I wanted that one person to want to be with me. I wanted them to think of me first. I wanted to be the person they wanted to share their good news with; their bad news with and all the other news in between. I wanted passion and angst (yes, I said angst). I wanted that feeling like you were going to be jumping off the edge together because it was the only way to go.
Romantic Love
I’m lucky. I found that. It wasn’t easy and sometimes, it’s still not easy. I think there are times we forget how hard we can be on the people we love and how hard the people we love can be on us. There’s danger in trying to protect the people we love from ourselves – I don’t mean in an abusive sense – but rather in the sense that we can’t share our fears, our anxieties and our frustrations. When we don’t want to expose the people or the person in our lives to the part of ourselves that we consider negative.
It can get confusing when we look outside the relationship for confidences and it can actually rattle the foundation of the relationship more than anything else. But in truth – what is more romantic than a man standing there, with tears in his eyes, honestly opening up about what’s bothering him? When he can trust and believe that you won’t be pushed away by a demonstration of naked emotion?
Love is like a storm – sometimes it’s a gentle rain, warm and promising and sometimes it’s a torrent of emotion that knocks down trees and blows out the lights. I’m romantic enough to admire both and to want both and to appreciate both. No, it’s not always easy – but I want to be the person he can turn to and I want him to be there when I need to do the same.
What about you?
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