In Are You Running the Show or is the Show Running You? we looked how having an external locus of control, i.e. feeling that you are at the mercy of people and events, can make for increased anxiety and depression levels. Having an internal locus of control, which simply means that we feel that we have some control and choices over how we live our lives, results in lower stress levels and a sense of happiness and purpose.
Tips to increase your sense of personal control:
1. Become aware that in every situation, no matter how dire, you do have choices. You may not like either or any of the choices that are available to you, but reminding yourself that you do have choices can loosen the feeling that you are trapped and thus partially lower your stress levels.
Sometimes it is only your attitude that you can change. Yet, that too, is a choice and therefore a way to improve the situation. Attitude is often the difference between happiness and depression, and making the decision to think differently about a given situation is a choice open to each and every one of us. We are never completely trapped.
2. Get those possible choices out of your head and onto paper. Make a list of all the possible ways you can deal with the situation at hand. Often by deliberately brainstorming in this way, even more options will come to you, all of which may be explored as possible solutions or ways to better deal with your current problem. Ask a friend to help to increase your options.
3. Once your list is complied, go through it and look at how feasible all your options are. Going through the process of listing all the alternatives can slowly open your mind to the reality that there are ways that we can deal with our problems if we can just give ourselves some room to move and not just panic. Even if you still choose the initial plan that you thought of before you started the brainstorming process, you will at least be more reassured that you are taking the very best action that you could in the given situation.
4. Get rid of thoughts and words such as “I have no choice.” These statements encourage thinking inside the square and this is exactly what you don’t want when you find yourself in a tough position. Expand your mental horizons and you will find that your physical horizons will turn a nicer shade of blue.
Contact Beth McHugh for further assistance regarding this issue.
Related articles:
Are You Running the Show or is the Show Running you (1)?
The Benefits of Positive Thinking
Stress Relief with Aromatherapy
Seven goals for Good Mental Health