Author Archives:

Out to Eat with All the Boys

Posted on by

It’s very hard for a family with five boys ages two through eight to go out to eat. We have been able to go to Luby’s, but that is when Nancy and I are both feeling very energetic and patient. Little things like having the trays carried to the table by cafeteria staff are a given. The bright side is that with the children’s plate going for $2.99, we can get out cheaper than at a fast food place. Two years ago in a weak moment, we decided that it was time to actually try to go out to dinner. … Continue reading →

Give Them a Chance

Posted on by

A few days ago, I reviewed the redacted file that the state gave us when we adopted four of our boys. It has the photographs that were taken of the three oldest children when the state removed them from the place where they were living. Seeing the pictures enabled me to benchmark where they were then and where they are now. Our oldest was four and a half when this occurred. He was aware of their living conditions and I can see fear and anxiety on his face in the picture. He was very anxious when he came to live … Continue reading →

Both Spouses Have to Be Committed

Posted on by

I have written a number of blogs that describe the traits that a couple might want to have in order to adopt a special needs child. It is also necessary that both of you are willing to dedicate your lives to adopting the child. I am specifically focusing on the concept that both partners need to completely “buy in” to the commitment. First of all, I in no way mean to imply that a single person should not adopt. It will take even more dedication and the work will be even harder. There are many single people who have successfully … Continue reading →

Educational Crisis in Texas

Posted on by

In my two previous blogs, I wrote about disadvantaged children that my wife and I had worked with in Houston. One of the really sad aspects of their lives is the fact that the majority of them will not graduate from high school. Our adopted children would have grown up in similar circumstances. The problem is that there is no one to rescue these kids. Several private organizations have released startling statistics that reflect that disadvantaged children in Texas have a poor chance of graduating. In the average year, over thirty per cent of the kids who started high school … Continue reading →

Hard Work with Little Return

Posted on by

Our former church worked with the children in a housing project in north Houston for many years. It all started when a woman in the church starting bringing a few children from there to church. More and more kids wanted to come to our church and other volunteers started helping. I have been in most of the worst housing projects in Houston in terms of poverty, living conditions, and crime. Jefferson Park (not the actual name) ranks right up there with the very worst. Drug dealing, robberies, rapes, and murders were common. Once when our volunteers returned the children from … Continue reading →

Trying to Rescue Disadvantaged Kids

Posted on by

Nancy and I had worked with disadvantaged young people who lived near our church for some time. We were determined to give at least some of them a chance to be successful. At best, it was always a “three steps forward, two steps back” proposition. Most of the kids lived in cramped apartments characterized by poor living conditions. Many of their parents had substance abuse problems and the kids had very little supervision. Crack dealers operated openly where they lived, no one seemed to care. The young people were quick to get angry and were always one smart remark away … Continue reading →

Be a Servant

Posted on by

There is a commercial airing on television in many markets that encourages the viewer to adopt a child. It shows a less than perfect Dad being a father to his son. The point of the ad is that none of us are anywhere near perfect, and if we were nearly perfect, we would not be all of the time. A child that is desperate for a home and family does not need to live in a mansion or have parents that have advanced degrees in adolescent psychology. The child needs the best home and the best parents that are available. … Continue reading →

When Foster Families Adopt

Posted on by

There are many advantages for everyone concerned when a foster family makes the decision to adopt a child that has been in their care. It is a win – win situation for everyone involved. The foster family is well suited to provide a permanent home for the child. They already have an awareness of the child’s background before he came to live with them. They also know the bad habits that the child has. If the child has to go to a new home, then all parties will probably have a difficult time for a while. Several of our Gotcha … Continue reading →

Finally, An Ethnic Question That I Can Answer

Posted on by

I have written a lot about trying to teach myself an African American studies course as I raise four boys whose ethnicity requires that I get myself up to date. I was finally asked an ethnic related question by my oldest adopted son that was a snap to answer. In fact, I was able to convince him that I am an expert on the subject. We were driving into Houston for an appointment with one of his doctors. We go back and forth over who has control of the radio; he had won out this day. We were listening to … Continue reading →

How Many Children Should You Adopt?

Posted on by

I recently received a comment to one of my blogs from a family that was considering adopting a group of special needs children. That got me thinking about the process of determining how many children to adopt. This blog will hopefully shed some light to help. We originally adopted four maternal brothers. That number grew to five when we had an unexpected visit from the stork. We have now informed the state that our family is complete. First, I want to discuss the reasons to keep the number small. The most obvious reason is that damaged children will have more … Continue reading →