Tonight was going to be a romantic evening. It was supposed to be my daughter’s second sleepover with her grandparents. Despite my great trepidation about the first one, it went well. Her grandparents managed to get her to bed at a somewhat reasonable hour, although she woke up quite early. And she didn’t miss us too much. Pancakes were involved.
Tonight was a different story. We went out to dinner and watched a movie, and at ten pm, the call: she was crying and she needed to be picked up. Ah, nothing like mom and dad to the rescue. With four-year-old bravado, she explained that today had been too busy for her and that she needed some snuggles. She still wanted to head over the next morning for pancakes, though.
My daughter has been begging for sleepovers lately. I think that it’s the cachet of going somewhere at night and the excitement of waking up at someone else’s house. That and we’ve been reading Franklin Has a Sleepover far too often.
If your child is like mine and wants a first sleepover, what can you do to make the transition easy?
1. Start with a safe and comfortable person. My inlaws have been babysitting my daughter since she was a baby, and when she still napped, they would put her down for her nap. She feels safe with them.
2. Talk about what a sleepover actually entails. I found that this took some explaining. It isn’t just the excitement and the dinner and the bath and the pillow fights and the warm milk. It actually means sleeping at a different house.
3. Read some books about sleepovers and discuss the questions and fears that the characters have.
4. Get everything ready. This includes toothbrush and jammies, but it also includes favorite books and stuffed animals. Send some familiarity with your child.
5. Check in before bed, but not right before bed. That way, your child knows you’re thinking of her, but you’re not a distraction right at bed time.
6. Be prepared to swoop in and collect your child. It’s ok to miss home, and kids don’t need to feel bad about missing their parents.
Has your child gone on a sleepover? How did it go? How did you make the transition?