My husband and I had plans with a group of friends this weekend. I automatically planned on bringing our baby along, until someone asked, “Oh, she’s coming with you guys?”
After being asked that question, I wondered when the day would come that I’d feel comfortable leaving her with someone else. I go shopping quite often without her, but I leave her with my husband. I’ve left her on a couple of occasions with her grandparents, but it’s only been for less than an hour. I’ve never left her for an entire evening, and we certainly haven’t left her overnight.
As planned, we brought her with us to the get-together. I was relieved to see that several other couples had also brought their babies along.
I felt like I had just as fun of a time with her there as I would have if I had left her with a sitter. In fact, I almost felt like I had more fun than I would have if we had left her at home, perhaps, because I felt relaxed, not stressed about whether she was doing okay.
Another thought kept popping into my head as the night went on: Is there ever a time when it is bad manners to bring a baby along?
I know for a fact that when we invite our friends to come over, it always includes their children. I don’t think I would ever expect or require people to leave their kids at home. I feel like that should be the decision of each family. However, all of the children in our social circle are under the age of one. I think it is harder for couples to leave their babies at home than, say, a 5-year-old. It’s also probably easier to bring a baby to a party than it is to bring an energetic 4-year-old, who might be more likely to cause trouble.
Of course, if we received an invite that specified that it was an adults-only get-together, we wouldn’t bring our baby – but we also might stay home.
What do you think? Is it okay to bring children along unless the hosts specifically state that the get-together is adults only? Or, should families assume that they should find a sitter, unless the host specifically says children are welcome?