I think many of us walk a tightrope between clinging to and working for the security of ourselves and our families, and indulging our ambitions and taking those big risks. For a single parent, that tightrope can feel even more precarious—do we focus JUST on establishing and maintaining security for our families, or do we stretch ourselves and give in to our personal or work-related ambitions? And, what if we don’t think we ARE very ambitious—is this a personality failing that will hurt our families in the long run?
I confess that trying to establish some security for my family is a priority for me. It has not always been easy and it often seems as if the powers that be are stacked against me. There is not always a lot “extra” to put into savings or reserves, and I haven’t been able to buy a house yet as a single parent. Still, I want my kids to feel secure and I’ve managed to sock some money away for college and other emergencies. But, life also asks us to take some risks—change jobs, start a business, go back to school, make major changes, etc. and these can feel like they fly in the face of security.
We single parents do not have those “cushions”—a second wage-earner or income, property and assets, etc. that can bolster a person when ambition and risk calls. It can start to feel mighty heavy when we think about how security rests solely and squarely on our shoulders. But taking chances is necessary and giving in to our desires for a different or better life, or acknowledging our own personal ambitions is important too.
I have found that by attempting to keep things reasonably balanced—not getting overly obsessed on either the security or the ambition side works decently for me. After all, there is only so much we can do about anything and we can only do our best and let the universe take care of the rest!
Also: Expect Your Financial Picture to Change