Everyone talks about the negative effects of divorce on children, but what about the positives? There are some, there have to be; otherwise we should all just give up right now!
Let’s see, for one thing children of single parent’s learn to be self reliant at a younger age. This is usually the result of having to do for themselves, whether it is getting to school, on time and prepared, or fixing something to eat in the microwave. Our children quickly learn you can’t call Mom at work every time you can’t get the DVD player to work.
Also they are usually exposed to chores at a younger age. My daughter does not do chores, but she has seen them done. There were times when I came home from work and there was so much to do that the only chance she had to spend time with me was to tag along as I sorted laundry, dusted or cleaned the bathroom. Hailey has known how to do all of these things from a young age; I just don’t make her do them.
Our children learn problem solving skills and to accept responsibility for their actions. There were many times that I wasn’t there to bail Hailey out of a situation she had gotten herself into, and she learned to do it.
Also, let’s not forget, children of single parents get one on one time with each parent that they typically don’t get in an intact family. My daughter has enjoyed many times curling up with one parent or the other to watch a movie, read a book, or just to talk. My favorite time of day is still bedtime, my bedtime, not hers. I go to bed early so Hailey comes in and tucks me in. She will usually climb in my bed and we’ll talk for a few minutes before I go to sleep. I love that time we have together.
And lastly, children of divorce learn that life is not fair, but it does go on and sometimes, it’s better than you imagined.