Today, my husband sent me a link to Spinner magazine’s 25 Best Opening Lines. I love lists like this, but once I took a look at this one, the fact that I didn’t know some of the songs made me feel old. But, I will comment on the ones that I did know!
25. “You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar”
–Human League’s ‘Don’t You Want Me’
Ah, the Human League. I always wanted my hair cut like the girls, sort of a Dorothy Hamill look with a rat-tail, which sounds atrocious now, but in 1981, it was so cool!
24. “I’ve been a bad, bad girl”
–Fiona Apple’s ‘Criminal’
23. “You never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips”
–The Righteous Brothers’ ‘You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin”
What a sad song that was made so romantic by Tom Cruise in Top Gun.
22. “Go, shorty. It’s your birthday”
–50 Cent’s ‘In Da Club’
21. “Hello, Darkness, my old friend”
–Simon and Garfunkel’s ‘The Sound of Silence’
‘The Sound of Silence’ was a staple of my freshman ‘Oh, isn’t life so melancholy’ period of college.
20. “I am an Antichrist”
–Sex Pistols’ ‘Anarchy in the UK’
What can you say about the Sex Pistols? All hype or all punk anger, they definitely seemed like the Antichrist in 1977 when disco was still alive.
19. “Well, I guess it would be nice if I could touch your body”
—George Michael‘s ‘Faith’
Hopefully, this is not what he said to the undercover cop in the bathroom.
18. “We don’t smoke marijuana in Muskogee”
–Merle Haggard’s ‘Okie From Muskokee’
Maybe, but “Fightin’ Side of Me” is still my favorite Hag song.
17. “I was dreaming when I wrote this”
—Prince‘s ‘1999’
Forgive me if I go astray.
16. “Pigs, they tend to wiggle when they walk”
–Pavement’s ‘Stereo’
15. “She was more like a beauty queen from a
movie scene”
–Michael Jackson’s ‘Billie Jean’
I don’t know why this is on this list – honestly, I never liked Billie Jean.
14. “There must be some kind of way out of here, said the joker to the thief”
—Jimi Hendrix‘s ‘All Along the Watchtower’
Written by Bob Dylan, but Jimi Hendrix comes along and takes all the credit!
13. “What’s with these homies dissin’ my girl?”
–Weezer’s ‘Buddy Holly’
This is a great song – love “Buddy Holly.”
12. “A candy-colored clown they call the sandman tiptoes to my room every night”
–Roy Orbison’s ‘In Dreams’
11. “Oh, I just don’t know where to begin”
–Elvis Costello’s ‘Accidents Will Happen’
10. “Tommy used to work on the docks”
–Bon Jovi’s ‘Livin’ on a Prayer’
I can hear the bao-bao-bao-bo-bo now…
9. “Jesus died for somebody’s sins but not mine”
–Patti Smith’s ‘Gloria’
8. “Well, it’s one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, now go, cat, go!”
–Carl Perkins’ ‘Blue Suede Shoes’
So how come Hendrix gets credit for Dylan’s lyrics, but Perkins’ gets credit for this? Oh sure, Elvis was the King and all, but…
7. “In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey”
–Beck’s ‘Loser’
Soy un perdedor
6. “Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?”
–The Carpenters’ ‘Close to You’
Oh, this brings a little tear to my eye – yes, I am a closet Carpenters fan.
5. “Don’t call it a comeback”
–LL Cool J’s ‘Mama Said Knock You Out!’
4. “Well, she was just seventeen — you know what I mean”
–The Beatles’ ‘I Saw Her Standing There’
It’s the Beatles – of course they had to have one song in the top 25!
3. “Hey, ho, let’s go!”
–The Ramones’ ‘Blitzkrieg Bop’
Only the Ramones could take music so simple and make it so great.
2. “I was born in a cross-fire hurricane”
–The Rolling Stones’ ‘Jumpin’ Jack Flash’
Not sure what this means, but it certainly sounds good!
1. “She’s a very kinky girl”
–Rick James’ ‘Superfreak’
Which leads me to think “if she’s kinky, what is Rick?”