My neighbor and her husband both return home from their jobs at about 5:30 p.m. That means their 12-year-old son Ryan (who is currently enrolled in summer school) is home alone for about two hours each day. I often see him riding his bike up and down the street or shooting hoops to pass the time until his parents return home. And he’s not alone; hundreds of thousands of children across the country whose parents’ work outside the home are left unattended—especially during the summer months when school is not in session.
Ryan is a great kid and I know his parents have gone to great lengths to insure he is well versed on the rules of home safety. I have been in their home and have seen the fluorescent poster board signs that hang near the phone that remind him to never tell the person on the other end that he is home alone. Rather, he is to tell the individual that his parents “are busy and can’t come to the phone right now,” and offer to take a message. There are posters on the door that read, “Do not open unless name appears on list.” Attached to that poster is another that lists the names of friends and family members that are allowed in when Ryan’s parents are not home. The kitchen is full of signs that warn Ryan not to operate the blender, not to touch the stove or the oven, and to steer clear of the knives and matches. I also know he must follow rules regarding the computer and television.
Since I am not inside with him I don’t know how effective the signs are (although, I do think they serve as worthy reminders and the idea is generally a good one). I can, however, attest to the effectiveness of an unwritten rule that Ryan learned; the one that forbids him to talk to strangers. Ryan’s parents taught him that a stranger doesn’t have to be the unshaven man with a long trench coat. It could be a friendly woman or an elderly gentleman. Regardless of what they look like, he knows that a stranger is defined as someone he has never met. Ryan was also taught not to go near vehicles he isn’t familiar with. Since we live on a street with a dead end, drivers who are lost or have taken a wrong turn often use the cul-de-sac to turn around. The other day I just happened to be looking out of my daughter’s bedroom window as a car crawled to a stop in front of Ryan’s driveway. I heard the driver yell something to Ryan (who was alone shooting hoops). Much to my surprise, Ryan simply glanced up at the man, grabbed his ball, and walked inside his home. The car eventually drove away and a few minutes later Ryan came back outside and resumed playing ball. The next day I walked over and shared with Ryan’s mom what I had witnessed. She said Ryan hadn’t mentioned the incident to her, but since he was schooled that no adult should be asking a child for “help” with directions or to find a lost pet, she wasn’t surprised that Ryan simply walked away from the situation. I, on the other hand, was impressed that “stranger danger” had become more of a lifestyle factor for this 12-year-old boy than a fear factor.
Personally, I would be paranoid to leave my child home alone, but in certain cases, I understand that it can’t be helped. I’m just glad to see that my young neighbor realizes the importance of playing it safe inside and outside of his home.