I ran across the phrase defensive pessimism in a magazine recently and as I read the description of it, I found myself staring at it and being amazed. You see, because the description I read – was myself to a tee.
When confronted with a crisis, we often talk about looking at the worst possible outcome. In defensive pessimism, you take looking at the worst possible outcome a step further. You examine every detail of what could go wrong and how you would in turn respond to it.
Two weeks ago, my husband went into the hospital in extreme pain and running a high fever. Over the few hours that we waited to get the diagnosis, I sat there in the quiet of the hospital and watching him struggle to rest and I considered the worst possible scenario. What would I do if he died and how would I handle it.
I played out the scenario in my mind. I was very sincere and serious as I considered every aspect of it. I thought about how we would cope with the bills, how I would speak to my daughter about it and how I would have to handle everything in the future. You may think that a very morbid way to think, but I’ve always looked at every major crisis or situation that occurred in that light.
According to this article, this is called defensive pessimism. This form of thinking helps people to cope with setbacks in their existence by mentally preparing themselves for the worst and not just expecting it, but also planning for it. It helps to rehearse everything in order to prevent being caught off guard.
Defensive pessimism is a way of coping with stress and helping to reduce your levels of anxiety because it allots you a measure of control over the uncontrollable. It prepares you and it is a way to just cope with your stress – so it turns out I do have something of a positive mental fitness aspect that I’ve done for years all by myself and I have to admit – that I do find it works for me.
Have you ever heard of defensive pessimism?
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