Sometime in their career most teachers come across a discipline problem that parents seem to be totally oblivious of existing. When the teacher addresses the issue with the parents, the parents usually have some statement such as, “But he/she never had any trouble before…”
There are several things that can come with this statement. In this article, I would like to address various situations with a problem child and seemingly shocked parents.
Truth with lack of experience. The parents may actually be telling the truth. They may have never had any trouble with their child before now. However, the child may also have never had a structured experience. If this is the child’s first year in school then the parent really has nothing to relate with the situation. If this is not the child’s first year, perhaps the teaching style in previous years was more relaxed.
Truth with a change. Again the parent may well be telling the truth. There may have never been trouble before now. Obviously something has changed. Discuss lifestyle changes with the parents. Is anything new happening in the child’s life? What could be causing the child to act out in an undesired behavior? Is someone picking on the child at school?
Denial. Some parents use the term loosely due to denial. Talk with the previous year’s teacher and see if the problem existed there too. If so, the parents are likely thinking that if it is not addressed it will go away. Some parents had rather not think that their child could be trouble.
Statement with other intentions. Some parents do not realize that teachers talk. They think that you will never know that the previous year also had behavior issues. By stating that the child had never had trouble before, the parent is trying to place more of the blame on the teacher than the child. The parents are trying to make the teacher have second thoughts about what is happening in the class.
Older Children Need Parental Involvement in School
Keeping in Touch With Teachers