Do you get easily defensive when someone points out something negative in you? I will fully admit that I do. Even if I don’t display it outwardly, inside I bristle. I would think that most of us have a difficult time hearing something we don’t want to hear. Yet the truth is that many times the only way we can grow as a person is to be able to learn how to handle the truth.
Recently I was having a conversation with my 16-year-old son. I brought up a concern I had, something I was seeing in him. Immediately he turned it around on me. The details really don’t matter but let’s just say that it gave me cause to stop and think. Was there some truth to what he was saying?
Many parents have heard their teens say things like, “You never listen to me,” “You treat me like a baby,” “You don’t care what I think” and the list could go on. Have you ever thought to stop and ask yourself, “Is there some truth to what my teen is saying?”
Could it be that you really don’t listen to your teen? That all you do is talk, talk, talk…instead of just sitting back and putting on your listening ears? Is it possible that you are being overprotective? Could it be that you really don’t demonstrate actions that show you truly care?
If there is one teen in my house that is quick to point out my faults, it is my daughter. She made a good point one evening about something I had done, even though at the moment I wasn’t ready to receive it. I was ready to defend myself.
It wasn’t until later when I gave it some thought that I realized what she said did have some truth to it and I had to own up to it. I apologized and admitted she was right. Sometimes parents feel they should never have to apologize to their children or admit they are wrong. Well, I beg to differ.
The reality is that we do get it wrong sometimes and if anyone can point it out, it is our children. Can you handle the truth? Maybe it’s time you try it.