A Doll for Every Child

What better gift for a child who might feel different than a doll who shares her story? A well-made doll can help children feel that the way they are is beautiful. If you really want a doll that will reflect your child, right down to the freckle, birthmark, or adaptive equipment, you have several new options. Dolls Like Me carries a variety of dolls, including biracial African-American/Caucasian and Latino/Caucasian. There is also a line of poseable figures from African-American history, such as Benjamin Banneker and Harriet Tubman. My favorite item was a jigsaw puzzle depicting a ballet class featuring dancers … Continue reading

Gifts and Books for Adoptive Families

Why not use your shopping dollars to help people in your child’s country? Fair trade catalogs such as A Greater Gift (formerly SERRV) feature handicrafts that enable artisans to support themselves. From jewelry made by polio victims in Africa to ornaments and housewares from Chile, Guatemala, Vietnam, and India, this site has a small toy section with wooden puzzles, knitted finger puppets, and a large musical instrument section, a large furniture/dishes/table linens/home décor section, and accessories such as mittens, scarves, caps and hair ornaments. They have a range of inexpensive gifts such as candleholders or desk accessories or earrings. They … Continue reading

Book Review: The Christmas Menorahs: How a Town Fought Hate

My last blogs have talked about racist incidents a few adoptees have recently faced and resources for responding. The Christmas Menorahs: How a Town Fought Hate, by Janice Cohn, is based on the true story of events that happened in Billings, Montana in 1993. In 1993, a group in Billings sent out leaflets saying hateful things about several ethnic groups and Jewish people in particular. They spray-painted threats on a Native American home, threatened an African-American church, and damaged a synagogue. As Hanukkah began, rocks were thrown through several windows of homes displaying menorahs. One of these large rocks shattered … Continue reading

Resources for Responding to Racism

As a thirty-something raised in the Pacific Northwest, I have always known about racism, but seldom witnessed it. I lived a very sheltered childhood, and thirty-some years later still feel a bit of shock whenever I hear of a racist incident: “That happened here? Nowadays? Really?” My daughter’s Camp Fire group had a member who was adopted from Ethiopia. The mother and I began comparing adoption experiences. I was shocked when she told me her daughter had been experiencing blatant racism at school. Fellow second graders had been taunting her on the playground, “You don’t belong here. Go back where … Continue reading

Barriers to Transracial Adoption

A survey of 405 adult transracial adoptees (conducted by the TransRacial Adoption Group, which is upfront about being “committed to promoting transracial adoptive placements as a viable form of adoption”) found that 97 percent of participants agreed with the statement that white adoptive parents are capable of developing a positive sense of cultural identity in an adopted black child, 86 percent did not believe that preference should always be given to an African-American couple when both a black and a white family were interested in adopting a particular black child, and 93 percent thought it was not necessary for agencies … Continue reading

Historical Policies and Current Legislation Regarding Transracial Adoption

The Adoption History Project states that until the late 1940s, many African-American children were simply not counted in formal adoption statistics at all. The largely African-American states of Louisiana and Florida, in fact, did not record an adoption of an African-American child (by a family of any race) for decades before 1950. African-American parents felt discriminated against by most adoption agencies, yet were reluctant to establish same-race programs for themselves while they were seeking integration, not segregation, in other aspects of life. According to The Adoption History Project, the first recorded adoption of an African-American child by a white family … Continue reading

Is Transracial Adoption Necessary?

The National Association of Black Social Workers (NABSW) issued a statement against transracial adoption in 1972, excerpted below. “Black children belong physically and psychologically and culturally in black families where they can receive the total sense of themselves and develop a sound projection of their future. Only a black family can transmit the emotional and sensitive subtleties of perceptions and reactions essential for a black child’s survival in a racist society. Human beings are products of their environment and develop their sense of values, attitudes, and self-concept within their own family structures. Black children in white homes are cut off … Continue reading

“I Don’t Like My Skin”

“I don’t like my skin. I want your skin.” Uh-oh. This is coming from my four-year-old daughter. On the one hand, I’m not surprised because I know that children often want to look like their parents. I know that at the preschool age kids become aware of differences. I know that my skin color is more similar to the “majority” of Americans’ skin color (although “white” won’t be a majority in another 20 or 30 years, demographers believe). On the other hand, I am surprised because we have always told the girls how beautiful their skin is. We’ve never shied … Continue reading

Weaving God’s Love Across Cultures: Transracial Adoption and Faith (Book Review)

When the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America committed to exploring strategies for ministry to different ethnic groups, a group of adoptive parents and adoptees saw an opportunity to educate faith communities about adoption and provide resources to help families connect their adoption experiences with spiritual issues. Interested Christians of several denominations and ethnicities gathered in Seattle in the fall of 2002 to share ideas. The result was the book Weaving God’s Love Across Cultures: Transracial Adoption and Faith, edited by Rev. Mary Lindberg, containing contributions by adoptive parents, teen and adult adoptees, clergy, social workers and even a Korean birthmother. … Continue reading

Group Apologies and Ethnic Shame?–No Thanks

The director of my daughters’ adoption agency in Seoul has issued an apology on behalf of Koreans for the actions of Seung-Hui Cho, the young man who killed 32 fellow students and faculty at Virginia Tech University last week. (Cho was a South Korean citizen but a legal resident of the US who came here at the age of eight.) The apology was disseminated by an American adoption agency in Virginia which partners with the Korean agency in placing Korean children for adoption in the US. My local newspaper featured a Korean-American state legislator issuing a public apology and a … Continue reading